flat affect

when bones break
you don’t always feel pain,
instead a curious numbing
where your limb should be.

so it goes with
your mind,
if you need to break it.

when you choose
to retreat within
so you can do
what you can’t
but must do,
you peel
some part of you away,
as gingerly as you would
a layer of skin
from a blister.
you have at least
the illusion of control.

it makes a difference.

they tell you to
jump in without thought
because if you
don’t die from shock,
you have a chance at
coming out alive.

but when you choose
to cut yourself off,
a little bit
will always be sacrificed.

for the greater good,
of course.
that’s why we do
everything that nobody
should ever have to do.

sometimes it’s enough,
and sometimes the cost
is much too high.
everything has a price.

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